Thursday, October 7, 2010
hiding in the attic
My mind is holed up within this Turret at the top of this neat old house i photographed many years ago. i had attended a Photog class based on special processing techniques. i could tell you where this is but... that's not the point of this post now is it ? Since losing time i realize i've lost a feeling of purpose, there's much to say, much to do i know, only it all seems to have come to an impasse. It's not that i don't care, i Do! Perhaps too much and that's the confounding part. As i keep remembering things, accomplishments, failures, competencies and ineptitude's the good, bad and the indifferent; it all seems too involved. i want a simpler life...need it like air...but air is not so lovely any more.. everywhere i go is full of aromas i dare not enjoy, can not stay to inhale all these things others take for granted...as i once did. i want to be with family and friends... but they all need their lovely aromas around them. The scented candles, essential oil (essential? to whom?) Air fresheners... does anyone really understand the chemistry we spray into the air thinking it "freshens" when it truly is Polluting the air all around them? These chemicals are often not even tested on humans nor animals to see what their short Or long term affects are. As long as people like the scent, No One seems to care what it is doing to our bodies? Least of all the chemical giants that create and promote their products as being "Healthy and Natural."
Plutonium is "Natural" .... am i willingly going to go find a pile and take a big sniff up my nose? or spray it on my skin, or Bathe in it? How's about a little sprinkle on my corn flakes??............... i think Not!
It's not just the scents either. Food is rife with chemistry i must avoid like the plague. M.S.G., Nitrates, Sulfur, additives. So many processed foods are loaded with preservatives and "flavor enhancers" these days. Daily i read reports, another study involving the toxicity of things we put into our mouths. Why Do we Need these things? Convenience? safety? Sure...................surely Not!)
Some beloved hobbies/aspiring careers, are things i can no longer enjoy... Photography and the chemicals....that wonderful "Soup" that brings to life the hidden images on a page that have been exposed and encouraged to come out of the darkness into the light baring the touch of the Photographers creative imaginings. i loved the entire process, from loading the film into an old camera...searching out my subject, setting the aperture and all that marvelous wizardry from beginning to end that i can barely remember, much less have an intelligent conversation about. My mind once buzzed with Photographic buzziness...now i barely drone..
Ah.. Yes! the 'cornball' is still skimming just under the surface of all this groaning and droning... All Iz not lost i realize...
While hiding in the attic i've been peeking out into this Bloggosphere, discovering so much. It's all So much to take in... but i am taking it in and neglecting to come back here to join in the discovery: the creation of things To discover.
There are Peoples and places and environments here...where i can go to and look around and See so many things i thought i'd never see because of these limitations that were strangling me.
i get to join my friend Funky punky as she roams the streets of L.A. digging for treasures to bring out of the perdition of a throw away mindset. Hoping to nurture her friends and the minds of those willing to look beyond their own prejudices into the face of Community. The fact that we are a World Community.
A young woman living her dream, crossing the United States on Horseback, finding more than she expected on the back roads and hearts of the people.
New friends 'Across the pond' who have the strength to write for a living and live a life worth writing about. Being fully aware and fully human, sharing at the cost of ones privacy, willingly reaching out to love and encourage those of us who need those gentle and strong words. "Get UP Off Your Bum!"(just paraphrasing;)
There are Homesteaders, Homemakers, a Hermit, Artists, Gardeners, a young lady in the military who rides and shows a Draft horse, an Old Geezer riding a wave of popularity as his followers join in making comments so numerous one can barely hope to find a space. There are those like me who struggle with the things life can load upon a soul... mind, hearts and bodies, Yet show up here to tell of survival.
There's Photographers who share their talents and others who claim not to be Photographers who's pictures share as much joy in the experiment as in the accomplishment.
Tell me ... Is it True that one can be a Photographer now without having to Touch the chemical Soup we once used as paint on canvas?
This Bee hive is fascinating.
Perhaps it's time to climb back down from the attic...
You can run but you can't hide.